Domesticated Ungulates

Yesterday we went to an Alpaca party.

Well, strictly speaking we went to chop wood for Katie, a new arrival on the island looking to stock up for the remainder of the winter. The wood we collected happened to be on the land of Sir Rodney Bowling who happens to have recently purchased two alpaca's so a modest wood collecting trip became an Alpaca party to which several local dignitaries were invited.

Oh, and I gave up smoking today.

Again.

I feel I may need to express myself more better. Sir Rodney, regrettably, has not kneeled down before the monarch to receive his honour, rather it was bestowed upon him by his friends who believed such a title befitting someone with as much land as he.

He has however purchased two alpacas which is possibly the sort of thing landed and titled gentry may do to amuse themselves. He also has his name painted on his roof in 6 foot high letters, has cut a hole from his bedroom into his lounge with a chainsaw to facilitate better TV watching, has a pregnant possum living in his larder and most remarkably of all, has a new girlfriend.

Despite his title and his land Sir Rodney leads a relatively modest life. Driving to his home without a four wheel drive vehicle is not to be recommended as the road is uneven at best, a swamp at worst and littered with the bodies of slow, stupid or suicidal wallabies. His home is very cosy being a bungalow with a kitchen-diner, a bedroom and a bathroom. It shows signs of his recent bachelordom but has been greatly improved by the presence of the aforementioned lady who laid out a great spread yesterday.

Those who have been fortunate enough to visit Sir Rodney's domain on more than one occasion (I count not myself among their throng) noted the fact that this was the first time they had eaten at his home, as his sister and best-friend were two of them I'm guessing it was a notable event I had the privilege of attending.

Sir Rodney's lady friend (would Lady Rodney be too presumptuous?) was charming and a dab hand in the kitchen to boot. He looks a great deal healthier than he has in the past and she seems very happy with the domestic arrangement.

Quite why I've started rambling on about the domestic habits of someone I met for the first time yesterday I don't know. Perhaps it has something to do with the long, dark and wet journey back which was only punctuated by the occasional bitter remark from my beloved. Set me off on my great escape plan again.

I think I'd like to write later today about my feeling of alienation.