Who Cut The Cheese?

I did!

Roughly 700 of them to be imprecise.

Didn't much care for it as a job and am thinking of starting a campaign against selling / buying half moon cheeses. If you like it why not buy a whole one and share it with a friend.

I'm not talking about the big 2 kilo monsters, just 600 measly grammes.

My shift starts at 6.00 am which is when the cheeses put in the mould on the previous day have set and are ready to be placed on racks for some process shoruded in mystery but which I believe involves salt.

I spent the post-lunch shift loading the moulds to a conveyor belt, roughly 10,000 cheese are made on my shift, I don't play ahuge part in this but I do play an integral part which is what job satisfaction is all about.

The main problem I have is not being able to fart in the factory. Apparently it's as good as airbourne excrement so one has to hold it in until the next 2 hourly fart break comes around. I'm not very good at this and tend to suffer from stomach pains as a consequence.

Perhaps I fart more than the average person as I don't notice anyone else making smells or looking uncomfortably inflated. Men fart almost twice as often as women and the factory is largely populated by men but perhaps they have trained their bowels to expel air only at break time.

But it doesn't smell in the canteen either?

Perhaps I'm onto something regarding smelly cheese. It seems like too much of a coincidence otherwise.

I'm working Sunday too.

At 6.00am.